Civ 6: Weather Report
|Civ 6: Weather Report|
Civ 6: Weather Report Thumbnail
|Date Released||March 11, 2019|
Civ 6: Weather Report is a Civilization sketch. In it, a News Anchor constantly ignores the Weatherman's warnings about the climate.
Description: "Who will win - the climate, or the intense need to build a World Wonder as soon as possible?"
|Kyle Sullivan||News Caster|
|Ian Conn||Alan Violence (Weatherman)|
The sketch begins with a news show opening sequence. The News Caster tells his audience that, after a long time, the Panama Canal is almost complete. After this, the anchor gives Alan Violence, the weatherman, a really short segment for him to talk about the weather (during which he is only able to say "it's hot") before resuming what he was talking about: the canal.
Suddenly, an emergency alert system is activated, cutting the announcer off. He begins to angrily rant about this, but none of it can be heard due to his audio being cut. A transition is made and Alan tells the audience about an incoming hurricane at the west coast. The anchor points out that it is entirely uninhabited, and with the weatherman failing to provide a counter-argument, the broadcast returns its attention to the caster.
The caster mentions concerns regarding the motivations behind one of the canal's greatest contributors, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints of Boats, and also claims that the project is being highly anticipated by all nations except Kupe's. When he gets to a point in the script that raises a negative point about the canal - possible environmental impacts, he asks for who wrote the script. Another transition occurs, however, and Violence talks yet again about weather catastrophes: this time, the simultaneous flooding of many rivers. The anchorman asks if any of them are in their country, and while Alan tries to argue that "they're all over the place", the announcer remains unconvinced of the importance of these news and gets back to his part of the program.
The anchor is barely able to talk before being interrupted again by Violence, and the two begin to argue and discuss. Eventually, the weatherman brings up the point that, in two turns, the canal is going to flood. Hearing this, the caster immediately changes his view and gives a speech about the doom of their project and civilization itself due to rising carbon emissions and neglectful weather reporters. Alan appears again, but this time, with good news, announcing that Mali has begun to adopt green initiatives that could postpone their "inevitable demise". The announcer misinterprets this, however, and thinking that the problem is solved, decides to continue the project, saying, "alright, let's break this continent in half".
The sketch ends.
- The "neglectful reporters" line is a jab against Alan Violence.
- Kupe's agenda in Civ 6 is fighting against climate change.
- The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints of Boats is probably connected to the Boat Mormons.